More "age of consent" nonsense

[KBCraig]

Father of 15 year old daughter finds out she's doing the dirty with her 17 year old boyfriend. Shows up at school and proceeds to whoop up on said boyfriend. Now he's facing felony charges for assault.

And... as a result of investigating the assault, the police are probably going to charge the boyfriend as a sex offender. Apparently there's no "age difference" loophole.

Gee, if they'd both been 15, would they both be facing charges? 

http://www.unionleader.com/article.aspx?headline=Father+waylays+daughter%27s+lover&articleId=d90c4227-0da4-4074-96b7-c8a67686372b

[J’raxis 270145]

New Hampshire law (RSA 632-A:3 II) actually does have an age-difference clause. Hopefully that's why this is only an investigation at this point, and he hasn't been charged with anything.

[Raineyrocks]

Father of 15 year old daughter finds out she's doing the dirty with her 17 year old boyfriend. Shows up at school and proceeds to whoop up on said boyfriend. Now he's facing felony charges for assault.

And... as a result of investigating the assault, the police are probably going to charge the boyfriend as a sex offender. Apparently there's no "age difference" loophole.

Gee, if they'd both been 15, would they both be facing charges? 

http://www.unionleader.com/article.aspx?headline=Father+waylays+daughter%27s+lover&articleId=d90c4227-0da4-4074-96b7-c8a67686372b

That is so ridiculous!  I'm so glad my mom was never like that; I mean filing charges on some of my older boyfriends when I was that age. 

[J’raxis 270145]

Father of 15 year old daughter finds out she's doing the dirty with her 17 year old boyfriend. Shows up at school and proceeds to whoop up on said boyfriend. Now he's facing felony charges for assault.

And... as a result of investigating the assault, the police are probably going to charge the boyfriend as a sex offender. Apparently there's no "age difference" loophole.

Gee, if they'd both been 15, would they both be facing charges? 

http://www.unionleader.com/article.aspx?headline=Father+waylays+daughter%27s+lover&articleId=d90c4227-0da4-4074-96b7-c8a67686372b

That is so ridiculous!  I'm so glad my mom was never like that; I mean filing charges on some of my older boyfriends when I was that age. 

It's actually not even necessary for a statutory rape prosecution. The state can file such charges on behalf of the "victim" if they learn about the relationship. It's for the children, you see...

<plug>
   See the links in my sig, Moral Outrage and CURSOR, for more on this nonsense.
</plug>

[Raineyrocks]

Father of 15 year old daughter finds out she's doing the dirty with her 17 year old boyfriend. Shows up at school and proceeds to whoop up on said boyfriend. Now he's facing felony charges for assault.

And... as a result of investigating the assault, the police are probably going to charge the boyfriend as a sex offender. Apparently there's no "age difference" loophole.

Gee, if they'd both been 15, would they both be facing charges? 

http://www.unionleader.com/article.aspx?headline=Father+waylays+daughter%27s+lover&articleId=d90c4227-0da4-4074-96b7-c8a67686372b

That is so ridiculous!  I'm so glad my mom was never like that; I mean filing charges on some of my older boyfriends when I was that age. 

It's actually not even necessary for a statutory rape prosecution. The state can file such charges on behalf of the "victim" if they learn about the relationship. It's for the children, you see...

<plug>
   See the links in my sig, Moral Outrage and CURSOR, for more on this nonsense.
</plug>

So if a teenager confides in a therapist that they've been having sex with someone a year or two older can that therapist report it to the state and then the state presses charges? 

Off topic but I took my son to a therapist years ago, he was about 8 yrs. old and I told her that I yelled at him over his behavior.  She asked me if I considered the yelling to be "verbal abuse", dumb me says, "sure I guess so".  So she told me she would have to call it in to DHS and report me.  That was the last time I ever took him there and luckily I knew the guy in charge of the entire mental health centers in that county and told him what happened and he told her she was being ridiculous.  My point is when people try to go for help to these mental health providers in my experience it's a trap and a medication resource and that's it.

When I was a trouble maker in high school this guidance counselor acted like she cared about my situation but kept insisting that I was doing drugs and asking me where I got them from.  I finally ended up telling her to shove her pen up her ass and leave me the hell alone.  From that experience though I can only imagine how a kid could be made to feel like they could trust someone like a guidance counselor and then have their world turned upside down because of it.

[J’raxis 270145]

Father of 15 year old daughter finds out she's doing the dirty with her 17 year old boyfriend. Shows up at school and proceeds to whoop up on said boyfriend. Now he's facing felony charges for assault.

And... as a result of investigating the assault, the police are probably going to charge the boyfriend as a sex offender. Apparently there's no "age difference" loophole.

Gee, if they'd both been 15, would they both be facing charges? 

http://www.unionleader.com/article.aspx?headline=Father+waylays+daughter%27s+lover&articleId=d90c4227-0da4-4074-96b7-c8a67686372b

That is so ridiculous!  I'm so glad my mom was never like that; I mean filing charges on some of my older boyfriends when I was that age. 

It's actually not even necessary for a statutory rape prosecution. The state can file such charges on behalf of the "victim" if they learn about the relationship. It's for the children, you see...

<plug>
   See the links in my sig, Moral Outrage and CURSOR, for more on this nonsense.
</plug>

So if a teenager confides in a therapist that they've been having sex with someone a year or two older can that therapist report it to the state and then the state presses charges?

Off topic but I took my son to a therapist years ago, he was about 8 yrs. old and I told her that I yelled at him over his behavior.  She asked me if I considered the yelling to be "verbal abuse", dumb me says, "sure I guess so".  So she told me she would have to call it in to DHS and report me.  That was the last time I ever took him there and luckily I knew the guy in charge of the entire mental health centers in that county and told him what happened and he told her she was being ridiculous.  My point is when people try to go for help to these mental health providers in my experience it's a trap and a medication resource and that's it.

When I was a trouble maker in high school this guidance counselor acted like she cared about my situation but kept insisting that I was doing drugs and asking me where I got them from.  I finally ended up telling her to shove her pen up her ass and leave me the hell alone.  From that experience though I can only imagine how a kid could be made to feel like they could trust someone like a guidance counselor and then have their world turned upside down because of it.

As you pointed out, therapists are legally forced to report incidents of child abuse; see RSA 169-C:29, et. seq.. Age-of-consent law is divided into three groups in New Hampshire, those over sixteen, those between thirteen and sixteen, and those under thirteen (RSA 632-A:2 and RSA 632-A:3). I'm not sure if a statutory rape where the younger partner is in the 13–16 range would fall under this, but under 13 would almost certainly be considered "child abuse" and fall under it. And yes, doctor–patient confidentiality is quite dead; see RSA 169-C:32.

If LaurieP finds this thread, she might be able to provide examples of cases where stuff like this actually happened.

[Fragilityh14]

my problem with seeing doctors and therapists is I never know when to tell the truth and when to lie

[Raineyrocks]

my problem with seeing doctors and therapists is I never know when to tell the truth and when to lie

Doesn't that suck!  They are supposed to be there to try to help people but you can't even tell them you yelled at your kid and feel bad about it.  What's the sense in going then?   

[J’raxis 270145]

my problem with seeing doctors and therapists is I never know when to tell the truth and when to lie

Doesn't that suck!  They are supposed to be there to try to help people but you can't even tell them you yelled at your kid and feel bad about it.  What's the sense in going then?   

This definitely seems to be the way it's headed. I would no sooner talk to a psychiatrist nowadays than I would a police officer who stopped me on the street.

[MengerFan]

Hmmmm. So what should one do if their fifteen year-old is doing it with some dude?

It sure seems to me that if I were supporting a young lady of that age, that it would be unacceptable for her to be engaging in that behavior. It also seems that my beef should not be with the dude, but with the young lady for whom I am responsible, as long as the activity was consensual.

So, what would you do, both as preventative measures, and after the fact?

[mvpel]

This father usurped the role of the government as the inflicter of retributive violence.

Ironic that many states to this day permit couples of these ages to get married with parental consent and/or a court order, and yet the 17-year-old here may be charged with a crime that may follow him his entire life.

Time was, 17 was coming up on middle-aged.

[J’raxis 270145]

Hmmmm. So what should one do if their fifteen year-old is doing it with some dude?

It sure seems to me that if I were supporting a young lady of that age, that it would be unacceptable for her to be engaging in that behavior. It also seems that my beef should not be with the dude, but with the young lady for whom I am responsible, as long as the activity was consensual.

So, what would you do, both as preventative measures, and after the fact?

A fifteen year-old should be considered an adult. If anyone says their fifteen year-old isn't mature enough, that's not something intrinsic to being fifteen years old: That's a result of however they've been educated, most likely a combination of their parents treating them as children far longer than they should be, and because they sent their kids to the broken government schools which are designed to infantilize people intellectually and emotionally, far beyond the age at which they would naturally mature.

Don't be overprotective of your children. Raise them right and you won't have to worry about your fifteen year-old doing it with some dude.

[J’raxis 270145]

This father usurped the role of the government as the inflicter of retributive violence.

Ironic that many states to this day permit couples of these ages to get married with parental consent and/or a court order, and yet the 17-year-old here may be charged with a crime that may follow him his entire life.

Time was, 17 was coming up on middle-aged.

Indeed. Time was, there were no "age of consent" laws. Time was, even after the passage of such laws, it didn't result in a life-long label as a "sex offender."

Fortunately the NH RSAs concerning statutory rape contain "... except as between legally married spouses ..." or similar language.

[KBCraig]

http://www.unionleader.com/article.aspx?headline=Teen+to+be+charged+in+Weare+sex+case&articleId=8e928875-b354-4869-9963-7764b41993b3

Teen to be charged in Weare sex case

By GRETA CUYLER
Union Leader Correspondent

WEARE – A 17-year-old Henniker boy who admitted to having sex with his 15-year-old girlfriend will "absolutely" be arrested for sexual assault, police said yesterday.

Weare Police Detective Lou Chatel said the boy will be charged as an adult.

He said the Class A misdemeanor offense is punishable by up to a year in jail and a $2,000 fine.

Chatel said he does not believe the boy will have to register as a sex offender, but will have to report the arrest on college and job applications.

Both teens admitted to having sex during the school day, but off school property, Chatel said.

The girl is six months shy of her 16th birthday.

She and her siblings have since transferred to another school, said Michael Turmelle, the principal at John Stark Regional High School.

On top of the pending criminal charge, police said the 17-year-old also was beaten by the girl's father after the father learned the two had sex.

It was Monday, Sept. 10 when the girl's father stormed school property and attacked the boy around 3 p.m., according to Turmelle.

School had just let out and the parking lot was filled with students and parents when the alleged assault occurred.

The boy suffered cuts and bruises and received two stitches to his face. The father was arrested and charged with simple assault, a Class B felony. He has not yet been arraigned.

The principal said he's upset at the number of people who have sided with the father over this incident.

"We all work so hard to give our kids a safe place to go to," he said. "Any time we have an act of violence, it's very upsetting because it is completely antithetical to what we're trying to accomplish."

The entire incident began that morning when the 15-year-old girl failed to show up for her first-period class, even though her social studies teacher saw her earlier that morning at school.

School officials searched the building, then put out a school-wide page. When the girl didn't respond, they called her parents.

The parents helped to search for their daughter, called her cell phone and coordinated with school officials, Turmelle said. The father seemed calm at the time, Turmelle said.

Both students returned to school at the same time, through separate entrances.

The boy had an excused absence, but the girl did not -- she was given Saturday detention.

Turmelle said the incident is over and done with from the school's perspective.

"We dealt with the whole situation from an educational perspective. We shared what information we could, made resources available to parents and kids. We've moved on."

Turmelle described the two students as "both very nice young people."

[LaurieP]

It's still a crime if you are within 3 years of age as a Class A misdemeanor.  You do not currently have to register as a sex offender under NH law with this age difference, however there are teens that are registering within this age group who fell outside the latest and greatest law changes on this issue.  A misdemeanor wont hurt your employment record as much as a felony, but nonetheless it is a sex offender conviction and Lord only knows this could potentially haunt him his whole life.  Because he never thought about or was never properly taught in school or at home about the AOC laws and where the lines were drawn, he and his girlfriend didnt exercise their RIGHT to remain silent and not tell the cops they had sex firsthand from their own mouths.  Had they just kept their mouths shut to the authorities, there would be NO case.  They have to admit the sex to authorties,(it can't be hearsay)... which they seem to both have done. 

Morally should these teens be having sex?  I don't think so on a personal level... but it's a personal opinion.  Should our criminal courts have to see a case like this?  NO.  Based on the charges, this is a completely consensual sex act and falls under your classic statutory rape scenario.  One only needs to look at the differences from state to state or within a state in the laws that govern which sexual activity within the teenage age group is legal or not.  It varies so immensely from one state to the next, it becomes obvious that these lines are drawn on moral principles, not legal issues of fact or criminality. 

For the sake of being controversial  here are a few of the many hypocritical lines drawn up for this age group:

In NH you can legally marry at the age of 13 as a female with your parents permission.

In NH  during a divorce case children 12 and above are allowed to be part of the proceedings and voice an opinion as to whom they want to live with... I know because I did it at this age.

You can obtain birth control without your parents consent or even emergency abortion pills under the age of 16.

Recently signed into law was the repeal of parental notification for our minor daughters.. they are apparently mature enough to have abortions, but not the sex that landed them in the position to make that decision.

Most parents trust children as young as 13 (even older siblings) to babysit our younger children for a few hours worth of time and we leave the LIVES of our children in their care.  This means they are mature enough to watch out for the lives of others.. but not mature enough to watch out for their own lives in the matters of consensual sexual activities... not necessarily intercourse.

Now I'm not one to say they are certifiable adults at these  young ages, but clearly some discretion is needed based on the individual teen and their capabilties.  As many a parent will tell you, teens of any age are not created equal.  Conversely older teens of 17, 18 and 19 aren't necessarily full fledged mature, wise adults who know the workings of the world.  Indeed the military now takes them as young as 16, not because they are MEN, but because they are brazen fearless fighters who will charge into enemy fire or dangerours situations with hardly a thought to life long consequence.  One only needs to observe the driving behavior of most teens to understand their lack of appreciation for the finality of life or permanent injury. 

It is a transitional age and rightfully so!  They arent adults, but they aren't children anymore either.  We raise them to be independent little buggers and then we get mad at them over their independent attitudes and actions!  How dare they, living under  our roofs!     Truth is, this is the stuff self capable adults are made of in the real world... and they are going to make mistakes and then most of them (shocker!) are going to make it the world.  This rebellion and transition is universal.  It's not just American teens, it's all teens everywhere.  Thank goodness those years dont last....