N.H. Judge Rhymes Ruling To 'Green Eggs And Ham'

[Kat Kanning]

N.H. Judge Rhymes Ruling To 'Green Eggs And Ham'

(AP) CONCORD, N.H. A New Hampshire prison inmate's file drove a federal judge to rhyme to express himself.

U.S. District Court Judge James Muirhead reached for Dr. Seuss' "Green Eggs and Ham" for inspiration when a prison inmate protesting his diet attached a hard-boiled egg to documents sent to court.

"I do not like eggs in the file. I do not like them in any style. I will not take them fried or boiled. I will not take them poached or broiled. I will not take them soft or scrambled Despite an argument well-rambled," Muirhead wrote in his response to inmate Charles Wolffe.

He then ordered the egg destroyed: "No fan I am Of the egg at hand. Destroy that egg! Today! Today! Today I say! Without delay!"

Wolffe says he is an Orthodox Jew and has accused prison officials of refusing to feed him a kosher diet. He is seeking to the proper foods and $10 million from the state. His case has been scheduled for a trial.

[d_goddard]

Seeing him sentence Russ, and later Dave, I just knew Muirhead had a great sense of humor 

[Puke]

How professional.

[Kat Kanning]

And THAT is all that is protecting us from the excesses of the executive branch.   

[Puke]

All rise for the "honorable" judge Jakass.

[KBCraig]

How professional.

I am reminded of the very amusing rulings issued by federal judge Samuel Kent in Texas, such as this one:

Before proceeding further, the Court notes that this case involves two extremely likable lawyers, who have together delivered some of the most amateurish pleadings ever to cross the hallowed causeway into Galveston, an effort which leads the Court to surmise but one plausible explanation. Both attorneys have obviously entered into a secret pact -- complete with hats, handshakes and cryptic words -- to draft their pleadings entirely in crayon on the back sides of gravy-stained paper place mats, in the hope that the Court would be so charmed by their child-like efforts that their utter dearth of legal authorities in their briefing would go unnoticed. Whatever actually occurred, the Court is now faced with the daunting task of deciphering their submissions.

With Big Chief tablet readied, thick black pencil in hand, and a devil-may-care laugh in the face of death, life on the razor's edge sense of exhilaration, the Court begins. ...

I see that Kent has been put on leave for some unexplained reason:
http://blogs.chron.com/legaltrade/2007/08/judge_sam_kent_put_on_leave.html

[mvpel]

It's so much more pleasurable to insult people in that style than the typical coarse American approach.  It's one reason why it's so much more entertaining to watch the House of Commons in session than the US Congress, not to mention the euphony of the "Right Honorable" appellation.

[lildog]

I think a bigger point is being missed here...

Wolffe says he is an Orthodox Jew and has accused prison officials of refusing to feed him a kosher diet. He is seeking to the proper foods and $10 million from the state. His case has been scheduled for a trial.

$10 million because he doesn't like his food!  Hello, doesn't anyone see that as a bit excessive?

Besides, he's in PRISON!  If you want to be able to pick your menu and have choices what to eat... don't break the law and go to prison.  It would be one thing if he were in jail awaiting trial as at that point he wouldn't have been given the chance at due process and should be considered innocent until proven guilty but the 5th amendment states "nor be deprived of life, liberty, or property, without due process of law".  Hence, once you have been given due process with the law you CAN be deprived of life, liberty or property.  Now that being said I will admit that sometimes the government abuses its power and does not follow due process (Ed Brown) but so far in this case I have not seen any evidence of it.

[error]

Um, he IS awaiting trial.

[lildog]

Um, he IS awaiting trial.

Where do you see that?  The only reference to the guy suing over the eggs is the following "prison inmate".  Did I miss something else saying otherwise?

[error]

Er, nevermind, I misread the article and thought it was referring to someone else (who is awaiting trial).

[mvpel]

They handle Korans with gloves at Git'mo to avoid offending the religious sensibilities of Muslims, what's wrong with a simple accommodation of this ancient aspect of religious observance?  There's myriad suppliers of frozen kosher food available, with overnight delivery. What's the big deal?

And maybe after a couple of weeks of kosher airplane food, he'd decide to research and exercise the millennia of halachic scholarship on duress and exemptions from observing certain mitzvot.

http://www.rjconline.org/hib53.htm

[d_goddard]

I assume this means, when they come for me, I can have my lactovegetarian diet, just like on the airplane?