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best first date

Started by supperman15, September 30, 2007, 10:26 PM NHFT

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supperman15

So this is to start helping us single liberal converting guys get some input from the women folke on talking and spending time with someone not quite so male...

give good advice, we know all the listen and look in her EYES stuff (i hope)  but some great ideas on the REAL things guys have done and said that got you thinking about them when they were not around would be great.

Here is my first one, don't be a wimp, and dont call her the same night you get her number you just come off as needy

cathleeninnh


If you don't mind an oldster piping up here. I've had some good first dates. I went for the coffee option, but here is some more input. I assume the eyes meeting across the room has already occurred. And also that this date is for more than just fun. Fun doesn't require a lot of talking and there are plenty of those options.

I like the idea of getting to know someone, without others around and in the light of day with a clear head as a first date. If she isn't impressed, you haven't wasted a lot of time or money. If she doesn't see you as potentially exciting partner, you may have more chances.

Now, to make that good impression, choose the atmosphere.  Lunch might even be better than coffee. As long as it isn't burger, pizza, KFC. Casual, not stuffy. Go for a sandwich/salad/soup place and make it leisurely. Avoid the topics of government, politics, and only skim through the family stuff. Maybe talk about the food. Or travel or animals or nature.

Cathleen


Rocketman

Quote from: cathleeninnh on October 01, 2007, 06:49 AM NHFT
Avoid the topics of government, politics,

I dunno about anybody else, but when I date, the primary purpose is to earn an extra vote for Ron Paul.   :P

Kat Kanning

Best first date:  a wedding and honeymoon.

Lloyd Danforth

Right to Bed!   Just, get it out of the way ;D

d_goddard

Dinner and a movie.
Dinner gives you time to chit-chat and get to know the person, plus it gives both parties lots of flexibility about how topical or intimate the discussion goes. Then the movie, which gives you the option of something to talk about afterward.

Coffee and chit-chat, or walk and chit-chat, with no other distraction, is good for the SECOND date (and subsequent).

Tom Sawyer

Quote from: Lloyd  Danforth on October 01, 2007, 07:41 AM NHFT
Right to Bed!   Just, get it out of the way ;D

That's why they call him Mr. Romance. ;D

The secret is to be able to make them laugh. Then leave them wanting more.

Lloyd Danforth

Quote from: Tom Sawyer on October 01, 2007, 07:57 AM NHFT
The secret is to be able to make them laugh. Then leave them wanting more.

Well, something along those lines

Rochelle

I voted for "something else," it depends on the people involved, but I suppose dinner and a movie must be a good catchall for everyone consdering it's popularity.

Having never been on a first date, I'm not entirely sure what the ideal first date would be. The first time my now-husband and I chatted was extremely painful and I spent a lot of the time pm-ing friends asking them for potential subjects of discussion  :blush:

Rocketman

Quote from: Lloyd  Danforth on October 01, 2007, 07:41 AM NHFT
Right to Bed!   Just, get it out of the way ;D

Beer Pot Luv!  Beer Pot Luv!   ;D

Rochelle

Okay, so I just asked my husband what he would consider the best first date and here was his reply:

i still dont get the american dating thing 
if he would be in finland it would be easy:
1) get her quite drunk
2) get yourself really drunk
3) ask her to sleep with you
4) next week ask her to move in
5) repeate to separate girls if first try fails

I'm glad we met online...

cathleeninnh

The fun route is the easiest. Charge up the chemistry and let it take it's course. But it can be the costliest. The fun part will carry you a year or more and if you know there isn't long term potential, extricating at that point hurts all the way around.

Cathleen

Friday

I voted for dinner and a movie.  In my experience, the modern American dating scene is frought with uncertainty and ambivalence.  So many guys play it SO casual that I'm left wondering what it is they're really thinking.  Does he like me? Are we just friends? What the hell is going on?!  Coffee is fine if it's a blind date, or someone you barely know, but it's a bit vague if you definitely like someone and are attempting to express romantic interest, IMHO.

Also, scheduling in advance makes a difference.  There's a substantive difference between calling a woman and saying "Will you have dinner with me this weekend" and "Hey, I'm at Murphy's having a beer, why don't you come over and join me?"

Lloyd Danforth

"I'm at Murphys.............Burrrp!, watdaya say I pick up some 'slim jims' drop over yer place?...............Burrp!"

Fluff and Stuff

Quote from: ivyleague28477 on October 01, 2007, 08:40 AM NHFT
Quote from: supperman15 on September 30, 2007, 10:26 PM NHFT
Here is my first one, don't be a wimp, and dont call her the same night you get her number you just come off as needy

And I have to say:  if the magic is there, you don't seem like a wimp or needy if you call right away...  you seem romantic and just as taken with her as she is with you...  :blush:

Don't do it.  Don't listen to a girl about this.  Don't call the same day.  Almost never call the next day, either.  Rarely call the 2nd day, either.  The only reason to call super early is if you are in town for a short amount of time or just wanna have sex, and yes, those are the same reason (and both signs that you are not going to have an actual relationship with the person).