11 Words That Sound Offensive, But Aren't

[Ryan McGuire]

http://www.yankeepotroast.org/archives/2008/09/11_words_that_s.html

FTA:

"My horehound is infested with cockchafers."
"How do you like my girlfriend's hand organ?"
"I prefer her cooter."
"How do you like my girlfriend's uvula?
"I can best express these feelings on my hand organ."

[Sam A. Robrin]

When dining with family at a fancy restaurant, make sure to announce to the table that you're feeling crapulent.

[Jim Johnson]

When dining with family at a fancy restaurant, make sure to announce to the table that you're feeling crapulent.

...may I be excused, I'm feeling a touch crapulent.

[Tom Sawyer]

When I was in elementary school I thought I was so clever to excitedly tell my parents that kids were "masticating in the lunch room."

I was happy that I got a shocked response

[Friday]

In French, the word they teach you in American school French class for "to kiss" is more commonly used in France as "to fuck".  You should have seen the look on my ex-mother-in-law's face when I attempted to use the verb "to kiss" in a sentence.   

Woops, I guess this belongs in the "Words that you don't realize are offensive, but they are" thread...

[William]

When dining with family at a fancy restaurant, make sure to announce to the table that you're feeling crapulent.

But don't be niggardly with the gratuity.

[Raineyrocks]

In French, the word they teach you in American school French class for "to kiss" is more commonly used in France as "to fuck".  You should have seen the look on my ex-mother-in-law's face when I attempted to use the verb "to kiss" in a sentence.   

Woops, I guess this belongs in the "Words that you don't realize are offensive, but they are" thread...

   I used to think that fuck meant to fight because that's when I always heard it.   

I used to follow my brother around when he was with his friends and I heard them say stuff like Rod Stewart had cum, (sp?), in his stomach and I'd ask, "why does he have gum in his stomach?"  Then they talked about getting laid by the boat yard and I asked, "why would you want to lay under boats?"   Well, finally he told me to shut the F up and stay away from him and his friends! 

Then I found his "dirty" little magazines and found out what everything meant anyway and his friends showed me some stuff too he just didn't find out until later or he would've killed them.  One embarrasing moment was when me and 2 girlfriends of mine were practicing how to give hickeys on each other, (our arms), and my brother and his friends caught us.

[EthanLeeVita]

(our arms)

You just ruined the entire forum's males' fantasies. Well, except for Dale.

[Raineyrocks]

(our arms)

You just ruined the entire forum's males' fantasies. Well, except for Dale.

Sorry!