Just thinking and wanted to share my thoughts

[Raineyrocks]

Yesterday Rick, Brandie, L. Ricky and I were sitting around the kitchen table joking around, planning on playing Monopoly and Rick got a phone call from his brother with some very tragic news.  Rick's sister died in a freak boating accident in Florida a couple hours before we got the call.  She has 3 daughters, 2 are grown and 1 is 11 years old.   Rick is of course in Florida now, we all couldn't go because of the animals and money for airfare.

It made me realize more than I usually do that we are never guaranteed a tomorrow or even another 5 minutes with anyone in our lives. It's so scary yet in a way it made me realize how much I take time for granted.   I've been at odds with my brother for a few months but I picked up the phone and called him to let him know how much he means to me and that I love him.  I don't want Rick's sisters death to be for nothing so I'm realizing even more that love is really all that matters even when I'm having issues with people in my life.
I hope if this can help anybody, if your not doing it all ready, to tell the people you cherish you love them and don't put it off until another time.

I may take a few days to deal with my familie's sadness and my own, meaning not being on the computer.  I just really wanted to post this if anyone is just waiting for another tomorrow to say what you could have said today. 

[Pat McCotter]

From the time my boys were born, I have always told then I love them when I or they were going out the door, no matter whether it was the few seconds to take out the garbage, the few hours to be in school, work or play with friends, or the few days or months I would be gone for work.

I learned this lesson at my grandparents' knees and took it to heart. Boys being boys, they resisted when they were teens, \especially when friends were around, but today they do the same without a second's hesitation.

[Raineyrocks]

From the time my boys were born, I have always told then I love them when I or they were going out the door, no matter whether it was the few seconds to take out the garbage, the few hours to be in school, work or play with friends, or the few days or months I would be gone for work.

I learned this lesson at my grandparents' knees and took it to heart. Boys being boys, they resisted when they were teens, \especially when friends were around, but today they do the same without a second's hesitation.

Yup, every second is precious!   When I went to Maryland last summer my neice had to pull my twin off of my van door so I could leave, that's how much she loves me! 

How are you and Gloria doing?

[Alex Free Market]

I've been at odds with my brother for a few months but I picked up the phone and called him to let him know how much he means to me and that I love him.  

I have a hard time coming to terms with the notion that "forgiveness" is some kind of virtue which people should encourage and look upon as a "good trait."  Quite the opposite, I have always felt it is a bad trait... and it is one of the reasons so many bad people in this world are allowed to get away with doing bad things.  This forgiveness "stuff" has the ability to cloud judgment, and ... well... lacking a better way to articulate this, but I just don't think the whole concept makes much of any sense.

Granted, their might be good reasons for getting mad at people, and ill thought out reasons for getting mad at people, and that might factor into it a bit.  That is, if you get mad at a person for a reason that is not entirely rational, then I suppose one needs to bite the bullet, swallow their pride, and remedy the situation..... but if we were to assume that a person did a bad thing to you (which isn't really a reply to the original post, just a general comment), then I don't think forgiveness is ever in order.

I know most people are of the opinion that forgiveness should have some "time limit" attached to it (i.e. the length of time you give them the cold shoulder being proportional to what they did to you), but I think that kind of thing is more of an emotional game to fuck with peoples heads, than anything.

It should be binary decision... you are either mad at them, or not.... Their can't be time limits attached to it like that where you ignore them for (t) period of time... and then gloriously reunite with them when the punishment period for giving them the cold shoulder is over.     If somebody screws you over, you either have to break ties with them forever... or alternatively, don't break ties and just suck the bad situation up as "the usual" (as I like to call it).  



Me belief sort of reminds me of Stefan Molyneux's "de-FOO'ing," I suppose... I don't really listen to his program... I'm only vaguely aware of the great criticism against him for advocating that.... but I believe there just may be something to his ideas.


As an aside, I think my rejection of forgiveness, as a supposed inherently "good" (in a moral sense) quality has gone hand-in-hand with my gradual rejection of virtue ethics, as I have gravitated more towards hard-deontological beliefs in morality.  

I now believe there is only a few fundamental moral goods which act as "first principles."   Everything else... the whole lot of virtue ethics baggage (kindness, generosity, dignity, courage, honor, etc...) I put in the category of preferences, and I look at them from a purely utilitarian standpoint in terms of recognizing that certain things may be "helpful," but I don't recognize them as being intrinsicially morally good qualities.