HUMOR

[dalebert]

Read this joke that I posted a while back before you read the comic underneath.

A guy goes up to a bar's owner with a big box. He opens the box and inside is a tiny man, about a foot tall, playing a tiny grand piano. He's playing it beautifully.

The guy asks the bartender if he needs any entertainment for his bar and says the little guy takes requests and is very good.

"Where'd you get that?!" asks the bartender, shocked at such a sight.

"Oh, a genie granted me a wish for setting him free."

"Really? Of all the things you could have wished for, this seems like an odd one." said the bartender.

"That genie's either hard of hearing or a smart-ass! Do you really think I wished for a 12-inch pianist?"

[Lloyd Danforth]

 

[Humorrhoid]

 

[Humorrhoid]

Read this joke that I posted a while back before you read the comic underneath.

A guy goes up to a bar's owner with a big box. He opens the box and inside is a tiny man, about a foot tall, playing a tiny grand piano. He's playing it beautifully.

The guy asks the bartender if he needs any entertainment for his bar and says the little guy takes requests and is very good.

"Where'd you get that?!" asks the bartender, shocked at such a sight.

"Oh, a genie granted me a wish for setting him free."

"Really? Of all the things you could have wished for, this seems like an odd one." said the bartender.

"That genie's either hard of hearing or a smart-ass! Do you really think I wished for a 12-inch pianist?"

Maybe an Avant garde genie?

[Humorrhoid]

Offer only good in Utah.

Why in Utah?

Coupon's is also available at Deal takers.

[Pat McCotter]

[Humorrhoid]

You gave her a dick ,she can turn it into a slinky.
Yank once for the Porsche,Two for the condo.

[Lloyd Danforth]

 Shmuel's Accident

Shmuel had a bad car accident involving a large truck.

Weeks later, in court, the trucking company's fancy lawyer was
questioning Shmuel .

    "Didn't you say, at the scene of the accident, 'I'm fine,'?"
asked the lawyer.

Shmuel responded,



    "Vell, I'll tell you vat happened. I just put my dog Moishele, into the..."

    "I didn't ask for any details", the lawyer interrupted. " Just
answer the question.

     Did you not say, at the  scene of the accident, 'I'm fine!'?"

Shmuel said,



   "Vell, I just got Moishele into the car and vas driving down the road...."

The lawyer interrupted again and said,



    "Judge, I am trying to establish the fact that, at the scene of the
accident, this man told the
     Highway Patrolman on the scene that he was just fine. Now several
weeks after

     the accident he is trying to sue my client. I believe he  is a fraud.

     Please tell him to simply answer the question."

By this time, the Judge was fairly interested in Shmuel 's  answer and
said to the lawyer,



   "I'd like to hear what he  has to say about his dog Moishele."

      Shmuel thanked the Judge and proceeded.



      "Vell, like I  vas saying,

      I just loaded Moishele, my lovely hundteleh (little dog) into the
car and vas
      driving him down the highway  when this huge semi-truck and trailer ran the
      stop sign and smacked my truck right in the side. I vas thrown into  one
      ditch and Moishele vas thrown into the other. I vas hurting, real bad and
      didn't want to move. However, I heard Moishele moaning and groaning.

      I knew he vas in terrible shape just by his groans.
      Den a Highway Patrolman came along. He could hear Moishele moaning and

      groaning so he vent over to him.
After he looked at him, and saw vat terrible condition Moishele was in,

      he took out his gun and shoots him between the eyes. Den the Patrolman
      comes across the road, gun still in hand, looks at me and says,

      "How you feeling?"

     "Nu, Judge, vat vould you say?

[Pat McCotter]

[Humorrhoid]

Lloyd ,

Vat is vsick Lloyd....a.

[Lloyd Danforth]

Sent by a Jewish friend. Better than the anti-muslim, anti brown people stuff I usually get from him. 

[Humorrhoid]

Sent by a Jewish friend. Better than the anti-muslim, anti brown people stuff I usually get from him. 

Most comedians I know who are really sick are Vewish. Watch out with the leftee ones, coz they can make you lose your mind.

[Humorrhoid]

Llyd,

Did you see the movie Borat? I lost my mind on that one.

[Pat McCotter]

Llyd,

Did you see the movie Borat? I lost my mind on that one.

I lost my mind watching the previews on TV. I wouldn't take money to watch it.

Also, Lloyd has been having problems with extra L's in his name. Quit taking his O away!

[Humorrhoid]

Llyd,

Did you see the movie Borat? I lost my mind on that one.

I lost my mind watching the previews on TV. I wouldn't take money to watch it.

Also, Lloyd has been having problems with extra L's in his name. Quit taking his O away!

Taking the O in his name is in his best interest. Being Llayd is better than being Lloyd..a