A challenge

[Kat Kanning]

I think there are four conditions--that's why they call it "fourgiveness."  I've made it alliterative for easy memorization.
A person has to:
1.  Recognize that what he did was wrong.
2.  Regret having done it.
3.  Show some evident attempt to
     Reform.
and
4.  Make, to whatever degree possible,
     Restitution.

If they've fulfilled those conditions, they've earned forgiveness.  If they haven't, forgiveness is just sanction to go right on committing wrongdoing.

It's typically for YOUR benefit to let things go, not hold a grudge.  If you wait until the other person does right, you'll be holding a lot of grudges.

[Russell Kanning]

if people waited until I righted all wrongs, I wouldn't have anyone to talk to

[John]

Yesterday I "watched" myself and recognized another "little thing" to work on (actually its not work; just a need to recognize and then let go) and again life improved a bit more for me, as-soon-as I decided to let those "little" resentments go.
These little resentments were of no positive value. They were not helping me to better handle life, and it surely was not helping the people who do this little thing.
From now on when this particular "little thing" happens, I will be able to smile rather than get tense.


Let it Go

[Free libertarian]

The real test for John will be whether he harbors any resentment towards Misty the Cat for edging him out in a recent Free Grafton election.  Will he be able to accomplish this with nary a catty remark?   

[John]

A friend sent this to me today:

Fable Of The Porcupine

It was the coldest winter ever.
Many animals died because of the cold.
The porcupines, realizing the situation, decided to group together.
This way they covered and protected themselves; but the quills of each one wounded their closest companions even though they gave off heat to each other.
After a while, they decided to distance themselves one from the other and they began to die, alone and frozen.
So they had to make a choice: either accept the quills of their companions or disappear from the Earth.
Wisely, they decided to go back to being together.
This way they learned to live with the little wounds that were caused by the close relationship with their companion, but the most important part of it was the heat that came from the others.
This way they were able to survive.
The best relationship is not the one that brings together perfect people, but the best is when each individual learns to live with the imperfections of others and can admire the other person's good qualities.

The Moral of the story:
LEARN TO LOVE THE PRICKS IN YOUR LIFE....

[MaineShark]

And, as soon as Dale sees that, this thread will go all to hell!

Joe

[MaineShark]

Sometimes it is better when we don't provoke others. Yes?

I think provocation is neutral - whether it is good or bad depends upon context.

An insult might provoke someone to become angry.

A joke might provoke someone to laugh happily.

Publicly holding a grudge might provoke others to hold grudges.

Publicly forgiving someone might provoke others to forgive.

Joe

[John]

Yes. I was removing my responce for that reason ...
Anyway, thank you.

[John]

Check this out. I did not know it existed until just moments ago.

Please share with others.

Forgive It Forward
Forgive it Forward

[Pat K]

And, as soon as Dale sees that, this thread will go all to hell!

Joe

I was thinking that myself.
Now I think I will actually be disappointed if it don't happen. 

[KBCraig]

Fable Of The Porcupine

LEARN TO LOVE THE PRICKS IN YOUR LIFE....

When porcupines put their heads together, they don't prick each other, but their quills are pointed outward at any potential attackers.

[John]

Is forgiveness a sign of weakness?
Are you holding on to the "forgiveness fantasy"?


What Forgiving Is and Isn't
What Forgiving Is and Isn't - A Lama Marut Video Podcast

[jaqeboy]

... lately I have been feeling down about prospects... destruction doesn't by default make your side win... creation is what I get motivated by.

We'll be more fondly remembered for what we build up than what we tear down.

Building our futures... both literally and figuratively. Of course some don't seem to see a future worth working towards.

By your decisions, you build the future.

We try, at the AltExpo, to provide alternatives for people to choose from - methods by which to build the future of our choice.

[John]

Remember to be willing to ask for forgiveness from others.

Usually a simple and honest apology is a very good start, and sometimes it is all that is necessary.

If they are willing to forgive you, it will help them to heal.

[John]

Seems impossible?
Amish Forgiveness is Christ Like
Practice on the little things.

Olbermann: Amish Forgiveness is Christ Like