Oklahoma City Archbishop Drops Lawsuit Against Devil Worshiper

[Silent_Bob]

http://blogs.wsj.com/law/2014/08/21/oklahoma-archbishop-drops-lawsuit-against-devil-worshiper/?mod=WSJ_hpp_MIDDLENexttoWhatsNewsThird

The Archbishop of Oklahoma City is dropping his lawsuit against a devil-worshiping group that had threatened to defile a consecrated communion wafer allegedly stolen from the Roman Catholic Church.

In a lawsuit filed in district court in Oklahoma County on Wednesday, lawyers representing Archbishop Paul Coakley demanded the return of a communion wafer obtained by a Satanic group.

The archdiocese brought the action after the leader of the group said he and his followers would offer it to Satan in a carnal sacrifice at a "Black Mass" ceremony next month inside Oklahoma City's Civic Center Music Hall.

Michael W. Caspino, a lawyer representing Archbishop Coakley, told Law Blog that a priest collected the consecrated wafer from a representative of the group on Thursday afternoon, calling the development a "gigantic victory for decency and for all religions."

Adam Daniels, the head of the Satan-worshiping group, called Dakhma of Angra Mainyu, had told Law Blog earlier in the day that he would return the wafer to the Catholic Church if it agreed to drop the lawsuit against him.

"Once the Catholic Church has dropped the lawsuit, they can collect it from my attorney," he said. "I don't feel like wasting thousands of dollars fighting over a cookie."

To Catholics, a consecrated communion wafer carries enormous spiritual significance. According to Catholic doctrine, after the unleavened wafer of bread is consecrated at Catholic mass, it becomes the body of Jesus Christ.

"If an unauthorized individual has possession of a consecrated [wafer], it must have been procured, either by that person or by another, by illicit means: by theft, fraud, wrongful taking, or other form of misappropriation," the suit said.

"While I continue to call on all Catholics, Christians and people of good will to pray daily for cancellation of the so-called 'black mass,' I have taken a legal step to combat this blasphemous and obscene inversion of the Catholic Mass," Archbishop Coakley said in a statement Wednesday.

Mr. Daniels said he had obtained the wafer in the mail from a "Catholic priest working as a Satanist in Turkey."

Busch & Caspino Law Firm LLP, which filed the suit on behalf of the archbishop, was founded by Orange County, Calif., attorney Tim Busch, a prominent Catholic activist.

[Jim Johnson]

"Ya know, Adam ....yer not really cut out for this devil thing. All of the lawyers are mine."

[dalebert]

This was no more than a publicity stunt and it worked for that even better because the church responded the way it did. If they want to continue it, I suggest one of them attend a mass at a church that's too big to notice when new people come and go. Get the wafer placed on the tongue and take it out and put it away out of sight. Now it's been given to you and it's not stolen. Maybe video it. But really, all you have to do is get any wafer and claim that's what you did. It doesn't matter. It's only the kooky Catholics who have invested a bunch of silly beliefs into that damn cookie.

[MaineShark]

If they want to continue it, I suggest one of them attend a mass at a church that's too big to notice when new people come and go. Get the wafer placed on the tongue and take it out and put it away out of sight. Now it's been given to you and it's not stolen.

Presumably, they would argue theft by fraud, as they call upon Catholics to come up and get it.  At least, the two times I've attended a Catholic mass (a wedding, and a funeral), that's what they did, and my wife and I were far from the only ones who stayed in our seats because of it.  Maybe they only do so on occasions when they know there are lots of non-Catholics in the church, but it sounded like part of the ritual.

[dalebert]

Ah. Well then maybe they should just go ahead and do it, then do the ritual, film it, all that fun stuph. Then when the church wants to pursue charges, the wafer is already gone but they could offer compensation for the value of the wafer. The church might claim the body of Christ is extremely valuable but that shouldn't hold up in a court of law where it's just a damn cookie.

[MaineShark]

...the wafer is already gone but they could offer compensation for the value of the wafer. The church might claim the body of Christ is extremely valuable...

Wouldn't that be selling Christ's body?  I'm not sure if that qualifies as prostitution...

[dalebert]

Wouldn't that be selling Christ's body?  I'm not sure if that qualifies as prostitution...

Well, they don't literally sell it. They do ask for donations. Maybe prostitutes should work that angle to get around prostitution laws. I've seen a lot of people try it to use that work-around on alcohol.

[Pat K]

Is the church claiming the legal right to cannibalism ?

[Tom Sawyer]

Silly Catholics, or idiot Satanists...
Jesus says, "Eat me!"

[Free libertarian]

If you eat the right kind of brownies you might see Jesus...just saying.   

[Jim Johnson]

If brownies where the body of Lloyd, would Honey Brown Ale be the blood of Lloyd?

[Tom Sawyer]

See, this is why I check in... Even in Tennessee... The sacrament of Lloyd.

However, I think Saint Lloyd would have advised

Purple Jesus blotter acid... Lloyd bless the internet, you could have bought a 100 hit sheet signed by Timothy Leary.
http://blotterbarn.com/purplejesus.html

[Jim Johnson]

"This is my body, which is for you; do this in remembrance of me." I think Lloyd was talking to a women.

The blotter acid would be the body of Lloyd.

...and the Honey Brown Ale would be the blood of Lloyd.

Then you smoke a cigar... in which case the cigar would just be a cigar.

[Free libertarian]

If brownies where the body of Lloyd, would Honey Brown Ale be the blood of Lloyd?

We were good friends but he never called me honey.   Sorry, it's the brownies again....what did you say?

[Jim Johnson]

If brownies where the body of Lloyd, would Honey Brown Ale be the blood of Lloyd?

We were good friends but he never called me honey.   Sorry, it's the brownies again....what did you say?

Wait...              what?