Declaration of Independence: Draft 2

[Caleb]

So here's another option.  This time I took out the parts that were directly quoted from the declaration of Independence.  Methinks maybe we should stand on our own.  I left a little bit of the declaration in at the end for historical continuity.  Frankly, I like Jefferson's better.  He's far more eloquent; but will people stop reading if they see "When in the course of human events ..."?

Caleb

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It has been a long-established fact of history that mankind is unaccustomed to change; that, even when faced with tyranny, man will bear such burdens as he finds tolerable, rather than disrupt his stability by effecting change. 

It has likewise been a long-established fact of history that periodically men must of necessity change their accustomed forms of government when such government has outraged their morality and devastated their liberties.  In the face of such tyranny, men feel compelled to express the reasons which have forced their actions, both to satisfy the curiosity of others, and to serve as a message for posterity.

If there were any principle more noble, more honorable, and more American than any other, is it not the principle that we men and women are all equal, and entitled to equal treatment before the law?  We suffer no King, no despot, no tyrant.   All men, from President to pauper, hold the same precious liberty, and are accountable to the same measure of justice and accountability.  It is the government that serves the people, not the people who serve the government.  Thus, when any government fails to serve these ends, it is incumbent upon the people to change that form of government and adopt such government as they believe will serve them adequately.

Sanity and reason compel us to admit that imperfect men cannot be expected to form perfect governments, and thus we would be foolish indeed to dispose of our governments for trivial causes.  But when any people are subjected to a series of authoritarian and repressive measures, which continue unabated throughout successive generations and successive administrations, it is folly indeed to hold out continued hope for reform.  In such cases, it is evident that the evil comes from the institutions themselves, and is not due merely to the evil of a particular administrator.  And men under such a regime find themselves in the unenviable position of accepting the necessity of change, which is so naturally repulsive to the human soul.  And yet, that is the present situation of the citizens of New Hampshire.  The history of the present Federal Government is a history of despotism, tyranny, and oppression, which threatens to forever destroy our liberties and, worse yet, implicates us in morally reprehensible crimes against humanity.

To prove this, let the facts be submitted to a candid world:

The Federal Government has held persons indefinitely, (both foreigners and citizens) without charging them, in violation of the writ of habeas corpus.

The Federal Government, in direct contravention of our Law and Constitution, has engaged in spying on American citizens, using advanced technology to monitor our every move.  Nothing that we say, do, read, or write is safe from their surveillance.

The Federal Government has inflicted cruel and unusual punishment upon us, contrary to our Law.

The Federal Government has deported friendly foreign nationals to severe places, to experience the most inhumane of treatment at the hands of supposed allies.

The Federal Government has rounded up masses of people, based solely on ethnicity, and subjected them to the loss of their property and dignity.

The Federal Government has engaged in a policy of near-Genocide towards the original inhabitants of this land.

The Federal Government, in contravention of all law and practice, has set forward plans for implementing martial law in the case of declared emergencies, threatening to suspend our Constitutions and impose upon us a law contrary to our consent.

In anticipation of the above emergency powers, the federal government has devised plans for creating emergencies, intending to implement their nefarious schemes upon the peaceful people of New Hampshire.

The Federal Government has conspired, through executive edict, legislative law, and judicial rulings, to annihilate due process and institute the despicable principle of guilt by association and innuendo.

The Federal Government has repeatedly used the military and other federal forces to crush dissent and free speech.

The Federal Government has authorized the use of deadly force by the military against those who are engaged in such dissent, merely asserting their Right to Petition for Redress of Grievances.

The Federal Government has restricted the right to travel, based merely upon suspicion of misconduct through such outrages as the no-fly list.

The Federal Government, contrary to the natural law, has extended the rights of persons to corporations, who have used these rights to deny and disparage the inherent rights received by mankind from his Creator.

These corporations, being un-human, are motivated not by love, desire, happiness, gentility, nor any other aspect of human transcendence; rather, they are motivated by the basest of human desires:  Greed for profit. Motivated by only such base desire, these corporations have captured substantial resources, and have used these resources to control the media and the government, making it impossible for us to institute desperately needed reforms.

Even more dangerously, the Federal Government has endangered our security and implicated us in morally reprehensible crimes by arrogantly presuming, on behalf of American Corporations, to wage warfare, both economic, political, and military, on other nations which do not permit us free access to their economies.  A few examples suffice:

The Federal Government has presumed to assassinate leaders of foreign nations.

The Federal Government has presumed to stage military coups in foreign nations, installing puppet dictators for the purpose of securing American interests.

The Federal Government has resorted to the most immoral of methods in these foreign countries, including torture, death camps, and mass slaughter.  It has maintained the School of the Americas (based in Georgia, USA), for the purpose of training foreign governments to institute such brutal measures to maintain control.

The Federal Congress has issued a report alleging that the CIA commits over 100,000 serious crimes per year, crimes which are never brought to justice.  These intelligence agencies engage in drug trafficking, carry out assassinations, disseminate false propaganda, and commit economic espionage.

Furthermore, in the waging of warfare, the federal government has engaged in immoral behavior, which is universally condemned throughout the civilized world:  It lays land mines, tortures prisoners of war, and intentionally inflicts massive civilian casualties, contrary to international treaty.  Moreover, countries which fail to obey the orders given by the federal government have been the victims of devastating embargoes, embargoes which target the civilian populace.

Throughout these crimes and injustices, we have never ceased to hold out hope for change; and yet, our constant pleadings have only been met with greater outrages.  Our choice has thus been clearly submitted to us:  Submit to the federal yoke of slavery, or dispose of the federal government and be free men and women.

We thus hereby request that the legislature of New Hampshire make the following Resolution: That the State of New Hampshire is, and of Right ought to be, a Free and Independent State; that she is Absolved from all Allegiance to the Federal Union, and that all political connection between we and the United States of America, is and ought to be totally dissolved; and that as a Free and Independent State, we have full Power to levy War, conclude Peace, contract Alliances, establish Commerce, and to do all other Acts and Things which Independent States may of right do.

[tracysaboe]

you didn't even mention anything about the excesive taxations w/o representation.

Tracy

[Kat Kanning]

I like this version better.

[Caleb]

you didn't even mention anything about the excesive taxations w/o representation.

Tracy, I'm trying to keep it fairly uncontestable.  By that I mean, everyone will agree that the government does what is said.  Some people may try to argue that we should give corporations the status of people, for instance, but they will not deny that the charge is accurate.

I think that claiming that we are taxed without representation would be considered, by many, an untrue allegation.  We do, after all, have representation.  You are free to vote for whichever corporate-funded candidate you wish. 

[tracysaboe]

OK

You do your project, I'll do mine. Let a thousand roses blume

Tracy

[Dave Ridley]

I like the idea of sticking as close as you can to the original Declaration wording, perhaps italicizing the parts that you have changed.   It's very powerful.  New is bad.  Old is good.

Most people haven't read the original declaration much so will not be turned away by it.

[tracysaboe]

Why not have links to several different declarations of independence?

Tracy

[Caleb]

Tracy,

Draft me one, and I'll definitely link to it.

Caleb

[tracysaboe]

Actually I was thinking you could put both of yours up.

I'm working on that secession platform still. It might take me a few weeks to put that together figuring out how to fit it in between everything else I'm doing.

But that's something I definitiely might do that too.

Tracy

[Russell Kanning]

NH Independence

[Russell Kanning]

See ..... this concept is not too demanding or outrageous for a normal NH resident to agree with.

[burnthebeautiful]

I don't like the part about the state being allowed to levy war.

[citizen_142002]

Yeah, I believe (as do most New Hampshirites) that one of the state's few powers and responsibilities is to wage war. The part about intentionally inflicting casulties on civilians is going to make most people pause.

You could rephrase it to say something about the feds currently waging an undeclared and unconstitutional war, and one that as a preemptive attack was an act of aggression.

Just a side note; while I was typing this a FedEx commercial came on. It depicted two New England fishermen talking about what to do with all their lobsters. Ultimately they decide to ship them around the world via FedEx. But the good part was that at the end of the ad, it said "serving over 220 countries and terriotories around the world"
I wonder if that message related in any way to using Mainers in the ad?

[fourthgeek]

Please don't take this criticism too harshly, but I am likely to be about as critical as they come.

If there were any principle more noble, more honorable, and more American than any other,

If we are seceding, we need not appeal to American values (whatever those are.)

is it not the principle that we men and women are all equal,

not even Jefferson would claim this. The philosophers of olden days said that we are created equal. How we turn out afterwards is subject to nature and nurture. I would argue, however, that  we are not created equal. What proof do you or anyone else have that we are in fact all created equal, both "pauper and President"? If you mean equal in spirit/value, that is complete fluff and means nothing at all.  If you mean equal under the law, this is not true. Bribery, fame, etc. all control government. To deny it is lunacy, to abolish it is impossible. If you mean that governments should be tasked with and expected to treat citizens with equal respect and courtesy, then that I can agree with.

Let us not delude ourselves.

that the evil comes from the institutions themselves, and is not due merely to the evil of a particular administrator.

I'm not a fan of using the word institution, as it can be applied broadly to mean more than the government itself. Remember how much the Constitution has been misinterpreted.

The Federal Government has engaged in a policy of near-Genocide towards the original inhabitants of this land.

nitpicking: holocaust sounds better and is more widely recognizable.

The Federal Government, contrary to the natural law, has extended the rights of persons to corporations, who have used these rights to deny and disparage the inherent rights received by mankind from his Creator.

My definition of natural law is "survival of the fittest." This has nothing to do with recognizing corporations as legal persons. ??

Creator might be a bit of an issue too, unless we want our great grandchildren to be debating the merits of a libertarian theocracy, much like we debate various religious issues today. We should try to minimize or remove religionisms just to ensure we don't suffer the same issues.

These corporations, being un-human, are motivated not by love, desire, happiness, gentility, nor any other aspect of human transcendence; rather, they are motivated by the basest of human desires:  Greed for profit.

This is an extremely dangerous paragraph. It can be used to justify any form of collectivism, to abolish capitalism, to destroy the spirit of personal goals and growth, and is completely contrary to one of the many core arguments for libertarianism (greed is good.)

I would word it something more like this:
"Where powerful governments are controlled by business, the shadow of fascism trails not far behind. Where powerful businesses are controlled by governments, the echos of socialism and communism ring.
The unnatural rights and alliances formed between our Federal Government and corporations have combined these political Tyrranies into nearly unbreakable manacles, by which our people are stripped and flogged."

[tracysaboe]

If we are seceding, we need not appeal to American values (whatever those are.)

But secession is as American as Apple Pie! 

Tracy