How to get out of a family event that I don't want to go to?

[Raineyrocks]

I kind of feel like my domineering, over-bearing family member is dogging me to go to a family event that I really don't want to go to.  She has used guilt trips like the kids spending time with thier cousins, has told she won't forgive me if I don't go, blah, blah, blah, and yes I'm a whimp when it comes to this particular family member.   So I will shamefully admit I did agree to go after her persistence and now I feel like I'm stuck, what should I do?

[error]

Don't go.

[Raineyrocks]

Don't go.

Well derrr, but are there any really good excuses you can think of?

[error]

Don't go.

Well derrr, but are there any really good excuses you can think of?

You don't need an excuse. It's your life. If she doesn't like you not going, it's her problem and her fault.

[Raineyrocks]

Don't go.

Well derrr, but are there any really good excuses you can think of?

You don't need an excuse. It's your life. If she doesn't like you not going, it's her problem and her fault.

You are so right and as many times as I've told myself that it doesn't help, she still intimidates me.   I mean here I am asking for a good excuse when really I would love to feel comfortable enough to just say I don't feel like going.  I should have never let myself be mentally coerced into saying yes in the first place but she does have this certain way about her that makes me feel whimpy, like I can't so no or else.

[error]

Well, you can tell her you're not going, or don't tell her, but don't go.

[Raineyrocks]

Well, you can tell her you're not going, or don't tell her, but don't go.

Okay, thanks!

[ByronB]

I kind of feel like my domineering, over-bearing family member is dogging me to go to a family event that I really don't want to go to.  She has used guilt trips like the kids spending time with thier cousins, has told she won't forgive me if I don't go, blah, blah, blah, and yes I'm a whimp when it comes to this particular family member.   So I will shamefully admit I did agree to go after her persistence and now I feel like I'm stuck, what should I do?

Your car could quit on you unexpectedly last minute... but I guess that is only a temporary fix to a longer term problem if I'm reading into this correctly.

[doobie]

Don't go.

Well derrr, but are there any really good excuses you can think of?

Something better came up.  I won the lottery, so f* off.

[AnarcSyn]

well, unless there is a chance of gettin into body blows w/ someone at this get together, go and have a good time in spite of it all..

balance out the opportunities of having fun v/s not having fun..

but it seems as if you've agreed to go.. so, go...  and rather than sit around all sullen and agitated, take advantage of moments that arise that offer a chance to getting out of your way and enjoying yourself...

or sit at home and watch the cubbies continue their path to winning the world series...
go cubbies!!!

Be Well

[MengerFan]

Tell her you don't hang out with people who bully and manipulate you into doing things you don't want to do.

[doobie]

If they are anti-gun...go and open carry... if it is out of state... say your probation doesn't allow you to leave the state.

[Raineyrocks]

I kind of feel like my domineering, over-bearing family member is dogging me to go to a family event that I really don't want to go to.  She has used guilt trips like the kids spending time with thier cousins, has told she won't forgive me if I don't go, blah, blah, blah, and yes I'm a whimp when it comes to this particular family member.   So I will shamefully admit I did agree to go after her persistence and now I feel like I'm stuck, what should I do?

Your car could quit on you unexpectedly last minute... but I guess that is only a temporary fix to a longer term problem if I'm reading into this correctly.

Thanks, I wish it could be that easy but this event is too far away for that excuse and your right it would be temporary.  I just need to deal with this once and for all and explain the way I feel to her.  There are just so many other circumstances having to do with our relationship that's what really makes this more difficult.

She usually wears a real hard shell and over the past few years she has really let me into to her heart as much as she will let anyone.  That's why I'm so whimpy around her because I don't want to lose the relationship either and I know she can make herself real hard at times and just cut people out of her life.   I just want it to change a little and have her stop backing me into corners with lots of stuff.  The thing I want the very most is to be able to tell her how I really feel without losing our relationship.

[Raineyrocks]

Don't go.

Well derrr, but are there any really good excuses you can think of?

Something better came up.  I won the lottery, so f* off.

Nah, if  she thought I won the lottery she's already on my list to become rich and I really never want to tell her to f off because I do really like most of her just not the dominating part.  Thanks anyway!

[Pat McCotter]

Is this a close relative? Go and pretend to enjoy. She won't be around forever and you will regret not having gone to see her.

Is it a friend of the family? Go and pretend to enjoy. She won't be around forever and you will regret not having gone to see her.

Maybe try to discuss the problems you have with her.

Otherwise put your foot down, stick out your bottom lip and scream, "I'm not going and you can't make me!" Then you can enjoy that nice white coat that makes you hug yourself and the pretty little pills they give you as you listen to this.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TXZMZ-XvvzI