Insufferable Weird Dream Thread

[WithoutAPaddle]

Like a lot of people, I had long thought that if I was having an unpleasant dream, if I could just pinch myself, I'd wake up, thereby ending it.  Well, one time when I was having such a dream, I thought to pinch myself and did.  Or dreamed I did.  In my dream the pinch woke me up, but I was actually dreaming I had woken up.  And as luck would have it, in real life a truck outside blasted its horn and really did wake me up, and I was shocked to see that both my arms and hands were extended away from my body, positioned where they couldn't have been if I had indeed pinched or attempted to pinch myself, so I am now resigned to the conclusion that pinching one's self is not a viable dream exit strategy.

[Jim Johnson]

...neither is falling on ones back. I tried that in a super realistic dream I had about 2 months ago. When fell I hit my head on the floor, after which I had a headache in my dream.

[dalebert]

I don't think the pinch is to wake you up. It's just to know if you're dreaming, the idea being it won't hurt if it's a dream. I have definitely felt pain in dreams, but I don't know if I can induce pain in myself in them. Once I dreamt I was in the huge dark space and someone use a barbed whip on me. It wrapped around my waist and the barbs dug in as he pulled. The barbs were about an inch long and that's how it felt, or at least it felt how I imagine that would feel. It was excruciating. I didn't have a stomach ache or anything when I woke up.

[dalebert]

I was in prison and there was a guy who could stop time except that bugs weren't affected. It felt like I was in a movie like none of it was quite real and I kind of knew what was going to happen a little bit, like I'd seen the trailer. The guy who stopped time looked like Chris Rock and cracked a lot of jokes. He stopped time and lots of prisoners started escaping including me. I was kind of a little guy in the movie (shut up!) and I was partnered up with a pretty big guy in my escape. At one point, a police van drove by but it was being driven by Chris with a buddy of his. I told the big guy it was okay but he didn't trust Chris Rock even though he had facilitated our escape so he went off on his own while I joined up with Chris.

[Tom Sawyer]

You could have just put on your dinosaur onesie and  been in disguise!

[dalebert]

I think I have nightmares when it's hot. At one point I was being chased by a werewolf.

An another point, people were getting turned into vampires, but these weren't sexy Anne Rice or Twilight vampires. They would get ravenously hungry for human blood and then not be able to stop feeding until someone was completely drained and dead. Their thighs and hips would bloat out from all the blood and they'd get very comically pear-shaped. Their necks got longer and their heads seemed heavier and would lull out and kind of hover in front of their chests. Then they would try to act natural as if there was any chance people wouldn't see something was wrong with them like standing over a shriveled up dead body of someone they once cared about and be all "Oh no. What happened?" They were basically tick vampires, I guess.

[dalebert]

Obama and Hillary were visiting Keene apparently due to Pumpkin Fest, though nothing to do with the riots; just there for the festival. I remember thinking their security was really lax. I walked right up to Hillary sitting on a curb. They brought a cooler of sodas and I drank two cokes. I remember while drinking the second one thinking that maybe they weren't for public consumption and I might get in trouble.

That's just crazy! I would never drink sugary sodas!

[Jim Johnson]

The key question then would be, why don't you drink sugary sodas?

[Tom Sawyer]

I want to know what's he doing hanging with Obama and Hillary?

[Jim Johnson]

He might be "drinking the koolaid", that's what we're trying to figure out.

[dalebert]

I had a series of dreams about really rude and obnoxious people. First was a special screening of some early Buffy the Vampire show(s). The guy who played Xander was there and looked really depressed. He went around the theater telling people we were supposed to pay a dollar but they didn't collect it right as we went in so people were handing him dollars. Then a guy in a suit sat next to me and smooshed me into the guy on the other side of me. He said he was a big guy and needed two seats as if I was now supposed to get up and go find another seat.

Then I went to a place in some rural part of NH called Goodburger that was supposed to have amazing burgers. I asked for two burgers but there was a long line so they would only let me get one. This place was super popular but it seemed over-rated to me. I forgot to pay so I went back to the cashier and he said it was $22 which seemed crazy high but I paid it and then a friend at my table said that's not right. That's not what they paid for theirs. So I went back to straighten it out and everyone was getting really annoyed with me for daring to question it. The lady who I perceived as the owner/manager just smiled and shaked her head. I said "What? Are you saying it didn't happen? Are you saying that's the correct price?" No one would actually talk to me as if I was just some ridiculously rude person and not worth a response. The whole place just reeked of being too good for regular people. It only occurred to me after I woke up how similar this was to something that happened at a burger place in Keene. They had a certain price listed and tacked on extra that wasn't made clear on the menu and I think my total was around $22.

Then as I was trying to work this out, I had pulled my cash out of my wallet for some reason and I had like $250 to $300, much more than I would normally carry. Three young women, teen girls really, saw the cash and smooshed up against me from behind as if to flirt. I told them to get off and they didn't. I said it was assault and they didn't care.

[Tom Sawyer]

It is an interesting phenomenon that many of the elements of Dale's dream that are terrifying to him are kind of different for me. Of course the $22 burger is universally horrible. 

[dalebert]

I dreamt about Free State Project, the musical, written and directed by Johnny Ray. I liked it so much, I tried to convince Johnny to take it on tour but we couldn't figure out how to fund it. Many of the latest candidates were performers in it.

[Tom Sawyer]

I dreamt about Free State Project, the musical, written and directed by Johnny Ray. I liked it so much, I tried to convince Johnny to take it on tour but we couldn't figure out how to fund it. Many of the latest candidates were performers in it.

What a great idea. 

[Jim Johnson]

Some sing'ng... some dance'ng... it still needs a story.